These tapes are pretty fucking funny. Who knew that a roll of tape would be the one to crack me up on a Friday night? Each roll has over 312 inches of sticky, comedic material, and can function just as well as regular scotch tape! In addition to sticking stuff together, these hilarious tapes can help you express a wide variety of complex emotions. For example, my personal favorite: “Fuck, Fuck, Fuck.”

But they can also be used for more than just making crude statements. This one, for instance, helps you mark your territory (without pissing everywhere like a dog).

In case you really need for something bad to happen to someone, you should look into this one: