Why pay exorbitant amounts of money to a sham fortune teller when you can find life’s answers at the bottom of a draft beer? This fortune telling beer bottle is dubbed “The Mystic Pint”, and works just like a magic 8-ball. It holds up to 16 ounces of your favorite brew, featuring 20 built-in answers to help guide you through all walks of life. The best part? You only receive your fortune once you reach the bottom of the pint, meaning that you’ll have a lot of clairvoyant drunkards at the parties that the Mystic Pint attends. So what else is the fortune telling beer bottle good for?

• Accompanying you to sports games – drink to find out the fate of the game!
• Accompanying you to the grocery store – drink to find out if you should invest your money in organic milk instead of regular milk
• Accompanying you to your car – drink to find out if you’ll make it home safe (I felt obligated to insert this joke, please don’t actually do this)